Most men are alike. When some aren’t, they are considered feminine, and yet there are others who first fall in the category of being great and then to the not-so-great category. Whatever do I mean? Well lets start from the beginning.

Most men believe that they are the most important species that we women are dealing with. Sure they may be great with numbers, especially with telephone numbers of some great leggy females, they are still their stages of infancy when it comes to feelings.

Most men are visually stimulated, they have to see everything to understand and believe. From a really great pair of legs to an adequately pleasing bosom.

A woman needs to be stroked and felt, while a man has already been stroked by his mere vision. He doesn’t need to purr, her just speaks his mind and sees it. This is perhaps the reason why men seem to get aroused much faster than women would. Most men love to be ahead of everything, be it career or sex.

If they cannot find themselves to get on to the top of it all, they lose interest. Most of the times, a man challenges himself into believing that he can be the best lover and although he may not vibe with the feelings of the heart, he does pursue the issue only because he knows that he can get his woman laid, in this manner.

Another shortcoming that he might face as compared to women is that men cannot understand images. They are trained in the physical aspects of life, which may range from making tree houses to even making their own homes. They cannot imagine that most of the planning can be done in advance so as to make their own lives easier a little later.

Women are genetically inclined to literary arts and poetry, which makes them the "feeling" people. People who can understand, feel and more importantly visualize. It is no wonder then that most women can partake in the mass appreciation of pornographic stories and pictures.

Men only use these as objects to get a massive turn on, again a visual aspect and not related to imagery. Most men prefer to have the light on, perhaps a little dim too as the thrill to watch a woman naked is perhaps unmatched to any other in the world. Women almost always need to have the light off.

Sex …. A physical need!

Sex is always a physical game for most men. During my survey of wild sex I encountered ninety four percent of men seeking sex in the animated form. For them sex need not prescribe to the notion of being loved. Yes love is a part of it, not the heart of it. Sex was always a beast-like affair. One that involved huge fight-like encounter, with both partners wanting for more.

This is so because for them, sex is only sex and nothing more. Its more like a pornographic movie, the more the better. Most of them understand the huge importance of drugs used to virtually increase sexual stimulation that can last for hours together, without any breaks. One man was hugely candid about saying that sex was more of a release of tension, of tensed nerves as it were, so the more release the better. The frequency of sex also mattered.

They did not quite understand the need for arousal or foreplay, as their typical need for foreplay usually spans around for 5-7 minutes, after which the real action needed to be turned on, as if a switch for releasing the mass of tension locked behind the sexual organs. Another gentle man made it rather clear that it was most important for men to experience the first bout of sex with a virgin.

The blood dripping out of a woman’s vagina was an experience he felt should be appreciated and tasted by all. The colour red was so sexually stimulating he noted that even though he might for a time believe that it might be painful for the lady, its lure was unmatched to any thing else in the world. Phew, quite ravenous, what say?

General practice

Aussies are having sex 106 times a year, or roughly twice a week, according to the 2006-2007 Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey. And, if you're in a LTR you'll know that "roughly" is the key word here. It's OK to have ebbs and flows, but too little sex just ain't good for you.

For starters, the health benefits of doing it more often are well documented: you'll look four to seven years younger, improve your immune system, decrease your chances of cancer and heart disease, trim your waistline (burning between 630 to 2100 kilojoules per session) and decrease stress.

Plus the sensation of touch can alleviate depression. And putting it back on the agenda can also keep you from Splitsville. "When two partners are confident, adventurous and secure in themselves and each other, in and out of the bedroom, they develop a sense of deep security through trust and communication, so they feel desired and desirable," says Dr Gabrielle Morrissey, sexologist and author of Spicy Sex.

"And when you're both satisfied and happy with your sex life it means you go out into the world lovers and allies. After all, that's what keeps you both hot for each other." So don't kid yourself it's OK to drop the sex ball permanently.

Shake up the routine

There was a time when you were so hot for each other you'd skip Underbelly and do intriguing things with Mars bars. But it's like any routine: do it enough and you'll learn to use shortcuts. "Couples develop a sexual road map to what turns each other on," explains Dr Morrissey. "But sex can get boring when you make love the same way, over and over."

The good news is you don't have to flip your sexual style 180 degrees. Arndt says that even the act of writing a sex diary started up a sex discussion among the couples who participated in research for her book and that was often the thing that fixed the problem. The trick is to maintain the affection and, yes, the groping outside of the bedroom.

"Every sexual activity is as valuable as penetrative sex - foot massages, hair stroking while watching TV, brushing up against each other in the kitchen all work to fire up the libido," says Dr Morrissey.

And that also means shifting sex (and that doesn't mean just shagging) away from the bedroom, as according to Dr Morrissey, doing it in new places means your body is less likely to follow familiar routines. So if you're having early morning sex in a tent on a camping trip, getting bent over the kitchen bench, or he secretly has his hand in your undies at a dinner party, it's hard to follow set bedroom routines.